The camp was a brilliant success. A friend looked after Zoe, so Rose and I could head off in the van for a night by the sea. I woke up that morning, sandy, a bit short of sleep, but with one word in my mind – happy. This is such a change from the morning misery that has become normal for me this year. It was bliss. We swam, cooked, read Sabriel (by Garth Nix) to each other, talked about our relationship and future, swam some more, and snorkeled. I spent about 20 minutes following a tiny little cuttlefish as he explored the shore, waving his limbs about and changing colors.

Rose and I celebrated 6 months together this weekend. It’s gone amazingly fast. We’ve had some wonderful times together, and some tough times too. I’m proud of us. We’ve both come from painful backgrounds, and building a safe, loving relationship that works around our limitations and struggles has taken care and courage for both of us. Considering that I’m a whole system of parts, each of whom have their own relationship of some kind with Rose, this takes time and patience. We’ve done well. I hope we keep creating something this beautiful and tender. She’s beautiful, and we love her.

Back to Adelaide, and I’m ill that night, I have a condition called endometriosis that causes miserably painful periods, among other things. The current hot weather only makes things more difficult as other illnesses make it difficult for me to regulate my own body temperature so I become heat stressed quickly. So I’m home, I’ve had to cancel some classes and tonight I’m sleeping in my lounge on my futon in front of the air con there. Friends have been very kind to me, helping out with Zoe, being a listening ear, or with caring gifts. I feel very blessed. I also feel anxious and undeserving but I’m working hard to keep my head together. Hopefully I’ll be back on my feet shortly. In the meantime, there’s plenty of homework to catch up on.