Ran around the place having tests done yesterday, the results are in. It turns out I have an infection in the nerve of a back molar, which sits right next to the TMJ joint, hence the similar kind of pain. It has killed the tooth and spread into the surrounding tissue, infecting my sinuses on that side also. So that explains the severe pain. I’m now on antibiotics, which I don’t react very well to, but which should kill the infection and therefore the pain, hopefully starting to feel some relief in the next couple of days. The pain relief is inadequate so tonight a locum doctor came out and we’ve decided to risk the allergic reaction to a stronger opioid. I usually get 12 – 24 hrs before my liver starts shutting down, and at the moment I need that window desperately. If I start to react badly I’ll go into hospital. In the meantime I’ve taken one tonight and it has helped a little bit although I am disappointed at how much pain I’m still in. The antibiotic reactions may take a few weeks to clear up, not dangerous but painful as I tend to ulcerate. The tooth needs to be either extracted in a week, which is cheaper but will mean I cannot chew at all on my left side, or I need to go through root canal work and then a crown, which is expensive and I have no idea how I’m going to get through it without decent pain relief. I had five teeth extracted at the same time once, and a salivary biopsy, and the experience was horrific. After 24 hours on an opiate that barely worked I was psychotic and my liver was crashing so I had to go cold turkey from then on, then reacted to the stitches which had to be cut out and replaced, I was ill for months.

So I’m kinda shattered. There’s no way I’ll be in next Wednesday to do my final art project, if I’m lucky I’ll be able to keep the impact down but my savings will be demolished and this could be a rough time. Having said all of that, I’m not in danger, just very miserable. I will go to hospital the minute I feel unsafe. Please don’t worry, it all really sucks but I will get over it. I’ve come through worse. x