Today Rose and I braved a scary medical appointment and then treated ourselves to icecreams down at the beach. I’m continuing my campaign to escape my life as much as possible. My sister is looking after Zoe some nights so I can stay with Rose, where I’m staying up very late to keep her company by text on her night shifts, watching a lot of TV, reading a lot of books, and generally not going mad. Today I even spent an hour in a hammock with a blanket and a book, watching two ducks waddle around the back yard. It is so damn good to spend a few hours not thinking and worrying about my future.
My system has been pretty lively, kids were skating on the polished floor boards on socks, a teen started a tickle fight with Rose. We only did one neurotic crying jag all day and no hallucinations.
We’ve been cleaning up at home and it’s no longer so cramped with mess which is helping. The sooner we can move furniture around the better. There’s nasty admin waiting as usual, but for now I’m indulging my wish to run screaming from most of my life, responsibilities, and sense of familiar ground. Like the trip to Broken Hill, these hospital substitutes do seem to work for me, thankfully.
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