My semester is finished! I have handed in everything and I am now on holidays. I am definitely able to confirm that being under pressure can keep you in crisis mode, living every day half in the now and half scanning tomorrow for impending disasters that must be foreseen and managed. This morning I slept in until nearly midday, then spent an hour in the bath re reading all my journals for the last year. This is what I need – time for quiet and stillness, time for reflection. My heart is singing.
I’ve put on one of my prettiest velvet dresses and then cleaned the kitchen, washed the dishes, scrubbed the stove top, folded all the clean laundry, and started listing all the most urgent tasks and admin that I’ve had to push away over the last couple of weeks. I spent a glorious evening last night with my love, watching ‘Wish I was here’, talking about the future, and eating freshly cooked waffles with banana, cream, and maple syrup in bed.
Our home is so beautiful. We are so broke but spent every spare cent this fortnight restocking our larder and washing all the dirty clothes. I have just enough silver coins to put a skerrick of fuel in the van and return the movie – hired on a $1 special and considerably less distressing than ‘The Imitation Game’ which I hired on the same deal as a reward after a rough day on Tuesday… Brilliant, but a terrible choice in hindsight which added fuel to an already building exhausted hysteria.
I am going to cook Arroz con Leche with the tin of sweetened condensed milk I have been saving for months, and try to clear out some of the hardware space on my primary drive before my computer goes into melt down. It’s a beautiful day! 🙂