After a couple of rocky days today has been mostly better. My system is settling down a bit, Rose and I spent a bit of time apart because we’d got into a spiral where we were setting each other off badly with trauma stuff… a lot of the time we can take turns who does the caring and who does the crashing but sometimes we’re not in sync and we’re spiraling. It was good to reconnect. My sister came over too so we took the day off and did our hair at home together. I’ve done a basic hair cutting course at the WEA a couple of years ago, and plenty of home bleach and dye jobs over the years. So I did a cut and colour for them both, and for me I’ve done a bit of a basic trim on my own and shaved off both sides over my ears. Then we’ve bleached the middle strip of long hair. Tomorrow I’ll throw some colours through it. So far it looks like this:

Happy to have it alternative again. Just taking things gently at the moment. Grieving a dead friendship and a bit stirred up, in a vulnerable kind of space. For now though, bed and Bradbury and poetry and sleep… if I’m lucky, strange dreams where the world is entirely different and I forget who I am for a little while.

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